tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post1602598723086155125..comments2024-03-18T08:02:51.154-07:00Comments on Had Enough Therapy?: Lying Your Way to LoveStuart Schneidermanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12784043736879991769noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-83779426751229989952015-02-10T06:00:59.162-08:002015-02-10T06:00:59.162-08:00A very good reason to lie about an affair is if th...A very good reason to lie about an affair is if the affair is over and the adulterer wishes to continue the marriage. Confessing to the affair does nothing but relieve the conscience of the adulterer and hurt the innocent party. If you cheat and want to stay married, you need to live with the knowledge that you were a jerk instead of burdening your spouse.the gold diggerhttp://diaryofagolddigger.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-10180477075853223332015-02-09T12:42:57.778-08:002015-02-09T12:42:57.778-08:00It a delicate question. Maybe you don't want t...It a delicate question. Maybe you don't want to confess all your transgressions to your spouse, but Catholics value confession to a priest at least?<br /><br />So a bigger question than confession to a loved one is whether you should know the truth yourself, or whether you can rationalize away things you don't like about yourself, enabling you to keep doing them, well like 26 times for instance.<br /><br />What does my new favorite psychologist, Jordan Peterson say in relation to honesty:<br />http://wildnessliesinwait.tumblr.com/post/44611942303/dr-jordan-petersons-rules-for-living<br />Dr. Jordan Peterson’s rules for living:<br />1. Tell the truth.<br />2. Do not do things that you hate.<br />3. Act so that you can tell the truth about how you act.<br />6. Pay attention.<br />13. Do not allow yourself to become arrogant or resentful. <br />18. Maintain your connections with people. <br />25. Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.<br />32. Do not hide unwanted things in the fog.<br />33. Notice that opportunity lurks where responsibility has been abdicated.<br />-------<br /><br />#32 is a most interesting metaphor, and I'm assuming its related to suppression.<br /><br />There's a weird fact in life that you can discover a voice that says "I refuse to deal with anything I don't have to deal with." and you can apparently follow that life plan for YEARS, and when the dishonesty of that assertion arises, you become dishonest, and find an excuse that you can believe that explains why you were not acting in a responsible way.<br /><br />And seriously, like the 26th affair joke, I do believe in a general philosophy that people do lie, but there are times when you shouldn't like, and being asked a direct question, with a direct request for honesty is one of those times.<br /><br />I never "forced" my brother to admit his drug use, and didn't trust he'd answer honestly, but I did spy and collect evidence, pipes, gummy coayhangers, etc, so when I asked him to leave my house, I never had to argue with him. I just said it was time for him to leave, and I stuck to it.<br /><br />So maybe that shows the problem with dishonesty. If you have to spy on someone, you OWE them a direct question and their own conscience to lie or not.<br /><br />I remember there's a toddler game where a toddler may thing they are hiding because they are covering up their eyes. I don't know if they really believe it, but that's sort of what bad liars looks like from the outside. The facts don't add up, but they have their story, and they're sticking with it.<br />Ares Olympushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09726811306826601686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-85829537534729904202015-02-09T07:39:48.452-08:002015-02-09T07:39:48.452-08:00Lying is sometimes necessary. But rule #1 should b...Lying is sometimes necessary. But rule #1 should be 'try to live an honorable life where your word is as good as gold.'<br /><br />Lie as occasional necessity is understandable. Lie as habitual behavior is terrible. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-23587821352684023472015-02-09T07:35:53.832-08:002015-02-09T07:35:53.832-08:00I dunno. Doesn't PC force us to lie all the ti...I dunno. Doesn't PC force us to lie all the time?<br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com