tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post1868002805499329785..comments2024-03-29T01:07:30.224-07:00Comments on Had Enough Therapy?: Husband Bashers AnonymousStuart Schneidermanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12784043736879991769noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-60603956606213447212020-02-26T10:25:41.513-08:002020-02-26T10:25:41.513-08:00Realized that this is what I have become, to defen...Realized that this is what I have become, to defend myself as I have done my entire life. Men have failed me completely starting with my Dad, my two brothers and two sons and two ex husbands. I’m confessing right now that I’m better off without all the demands that are being put on me like I have all the solutions!! I don’t and I speak the truth. When I talk to my girlfriends it’s to get advice or tips I’ve never called it Husband Bashing. My biggest concern is promises made that aren’t kept as I have been misled by MEN my entire life. Today I’m at a turning point it’s all come around my Mothers death three years ago? But according to this article, she was a Man Basher too...Thanks for the insight and awareness Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11596887582500997599noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-80722298712864894072016-06-21T14:31:21.821-07:002016-06-21T14:31:21.821-07:00Anon at 9:29: The late Brother Dave Gardner (Sout...Anon at 9:29: The late Brother Dave Gardner (Southern stand-up comic) finished with "beyond his ability to learn."Sam L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/00996809377798862214noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-72168199583031698262016-06-21T08:28:31.903-07:002016-06-21T08:28:31.903-07:00Even in otherwise good relationships, husband-bash...Even in otherwise good relationships, husband-bashing can become pretty standard. My father has a terrific relationship with his wife. However, after many years of marriage (he's 80), he's ceased to fight her on anything. Alone, I will hear how he's tired of having to read her mind, so he just does as he's told. <br />20 years ago, I distinctly remember him leaving an event to meet his wife even though he didn't want to. His reply was "I'm tired of fighting the battles. It's better to just give in." <br /><br />The result? He now does nothing for himself. This past weekend, on Father's Day, it was great to see him and have a nice time at lunch and watching baseball. But even my stepmother replied that his lack of desire to travel anywhere is deeply rooted in how she has managed his affairs. She recently went away for 3 days and came home to find that he'd not eaten anything in the refrigerator, but gone out and bought hot dogs and ice cream regularly. Why? Because he didn't want to risk messing up the house.<br /><br />Her response? "That's the monster I created and now I have to live with it." At least she's aware of her role. So few people are.<br /><br />My wife recently got very angry at me for....doing nothing. Literally. It's not like there was something she wanted me to do and I didn't do it. It's that I chose to take some time off from doing anything. "You've got time on your hands, so use it to get things done." <br />I replied "I do things ALL THE TIME, I just want to take a break today."<br />Hers: "I do things all the time too, that's no excuse."<br /><br />She then proceeded to spend 4 hours playing a game on her computer. Not in retaliation. That's what doing something all the time means to her. She comes home, drops her shoes at the door and scarf on the table. I bring them upstairs. If she's hungry, she might make dinner if she doesn't ask me to make it. Otherwise, if she's not hungry, I'm on my own. If I make something I like that she doesn't, she asks "why did you make that? There's XY and Z in the refrigerator."<br /><br />I am convinced the culture of man-bashing has ruined more relationships simply because it's a serious pain in the ass to keep putting up with this.<br /><br />"You never say anything good about me." To be honest, I keep telling what a great mom she has been, how great she is at her job (which she hates so that's not a compliment) and that our house is in great shape (it is, but she doesn't believe it). I should compliment her looks more, but when I do she says "are you trying to tell me something?" or huffs and doesn't take me seriously. <br /><br />It's a no-win game. I won't become like my father, and give in, but I'm refusing to play.RMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08163699908969849692noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-88011978792128867102016-06-21T08:27:14.713-07:002016-06-21T08:27:14.713-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.RMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08163699908969849692noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-54743749436537447182016-06-21T06:29:22.521-07:002016-06-21T06:29:22.521-07:00Years ago I had had enough of listening to myself ...Years ago I had had enough of listening to myself complain about and to my husband. <br /><br />So I chose to disconnect from those issues, and every time I felt like correcting him I just smiled or laughed. It was sort of the golden rule.<br /><br />It helps perhaps that because I am a perfectionist, lapsed perfectionist, housecleaning is not my strong suit. <br /><br />Wow, the payoff in our relationship, though we both fairly damaged individuals, the payoff has been astounding. And grows every year.<br /><br />I am happy with it.JayneIhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10242790210608861192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-59022915338232548562016-06-21T05:49:44.752-07:002016-06-21T05:49:44.752-07:00Ares,
http://dailycaller.com/2016/06/17/fact-chec...Ares,<br /><br />http://dailycaller.com/2016/06/17/fact-checking-snopes-websites-political-fact-checker-is-just-a-failed-liberal-blogger/<br /><br />Even a tertiary check of fact checking sites denotes that they are overwhelmingly leftist or liberal and biased especially when it comes to politics. So much for being a fact checker. They cannot be trusted.<br /><br />Will be busy enjoying the fact that my son and his three children are visiting for a couple of weeks and are a joyous experience. As much time as they spend in the pool one would think they would get tired, but alas no. Sometimes one forgets what a joy it is to be a grandfather.<br /><br />Have fun.Dennishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14962996070458991675noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-21171610377133492392016-06-20T17:54:59.369-07:002016-06-20T17:54:59.369-07:00Anon, my primary skill might be fact-checking, whi...Anon, my primary skill might be fact-checking, which I didn't gain from my education, but in frustrated defense against all the B.S. on facebook perhaps.<br /><br />Incidentally, the closest I could find to your quote comes from A.C. Clarke, although a slight variation:<br /><br />“My favourite definition of an intellectual: 'Someone who has been educated beyond his/her intelligence.'” ― Arthur C. Clarke, from 3001: The Final Odyssey<br />https://books.google.com/books?id=G7PkzB8scWgC&printsec=frontcover&dq=3001:+The+Final+Odyssey&q=intellectual<br /><br />Competence might fit better, less cynical, as we might assume incompetence is curable, and comes from practice and experiencing the limits of your knowledge.Ares Olympushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09726811306826601686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-57932450744567958472016-06-20T09:39:56.614-07:002016-06-20T09:39:56.614-07:00Ares -
Offered in the spirit of constructive crit...Ares -<br /><br />Offered in the spirit of constructive criticism:<br /><br />"An intellectual is a person who has been educated beyond his competence."<br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-58860659981872940032016-06-19T12:07:43.175-07:002016-06-19T12:07:43.175-07:00Oh, what a sad topic for fathers day!
I wonder wh...Oh, what a sad topic for fathers day!<br /><br />I wonder what lesson I'm supposed to take from this topic? I suppose the lesson is "Feminism sucks." We could call this blog "Feminist Bashers Anonymous" except for the Anonymous part, and the risk I'll get my comment deleted.<br /><br />Yet complaining about complaining is a warped idea. Complaining or critics in general allow themselves to be divine judges upon others, while their own transgressions are irreproachable. Oh, let's not forget about complaining about complaining about complaing like I might be doing.<br /><br />Overall for me the question is "What do we do with negative emotions?" If society says "Find someone to blame" that's a satisfying answer for a while, but as Stuart shows, picking someone close to you is a bad idea.<br /><br />So we can take Stuart's advice of the golden rule, but what does the golden rule say about resentment? If it is "your problem" then the golden rule might say "don't burden others with your problems", and that itself creates more resentment because others are allowed to talk about things you are not allowed to talk about.<br /><br />Anyway, I just don't know if I can blame feminism. It makes more sense, as Stuart does other times, to blame "Therapy culture" that says we shouldn't suppress anything, and that every stray negative feeling needs expression or it'll fester or something.<br /><br />I imagine there must be a balance between discretion and disclosure, and each has risks when done unskillfully. But that is such a boring conclusion, no to blame and all that.Ares Olympushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09726811306826601686noreply@blogger.com