tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post3276385360934630918..comments2024-03-26T06:17:49.527-07:00Comments on Had Enough Therapy?: The Cost of Workplace RudenessStuart Schneidermanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12784043736879991769noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-22327853085341372732015-06-25T19:29:03.718-07:002015-06-25T19:29:03.718-07:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11289534177301155692noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-37603560358464062752015-06-22T19:14:30.877-07:002015-06-22T19:14:30.877-07:00If your boss is a jerk, you don't want to work...If your boss is a jerk, you don't want to work for him. You may even want to work against him, and there are many, many ways to do that.Sam L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/00996809377798862214noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-24932208574094889432015-06-22T14:48:08.878-07:002015-06-22T14:48:08.878-07:00In my early twenties I took a night school course ...In my early twenties I took a night school course on Management Communications. The professor asked, "What one word best describes the nature of memory?" He went around the room, so I got to hear all the answers he rejected. When he turned to me at last I said, "association." This is the word he wanted to hear.<br /><br />Years later I read an article by a psychologist discussing ideas attributed to Sigmund Freud, but lacking a specific reference to his publications. If it exists I never did stumble upon the original source. Anyway this author said Freud described how a child forms associations between money, feces, and social obligations during the period when it also experiences toilet training. This also the phallic period because ideas that later form about sex and money have earlier associations. So, for example, a child thinks the father must bring money to please the mother just as he or she is encouraged to make on the toilet and do other socially required things to please the mother. Meanwhile the father, mother, or other adults may express significant personal displeasure or displeasure with the child. <br /><br />No one can escape the emotions induced by social patterns in early childhood. He or she can only pretend to do so by adopting a role rather than forming actual cordial relationships with others. This is why I hate Doctor Phil, his role of helper on TV could not provide a child with actual cognitive development needs, so a person who really wants to change the world for each individual should not make too much of the role he or she plays in adult life or on TV. Instead he or she should attempt to isolate and describe the real needs of young children which do not include an appetite to make money unless formed via association with the roles of adults. We do want to have some power over our own actions and the actions of others, which is natural, and deprivations cause us to want even more power over others, which one does not have as a child when one's needs are not met.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-26783832636265897532015-06-22T11:27:19.056-07:002015-06-22T11:27:19.056-07:00My own experience is that rudeness comes from a pe...My own experience is that rudeness comes from a personalized view of the managerial role -- that it is a status rather than a commitment. Does the manager believe he has authority, or that he is being if service? <br /><br />I am constantly amazed at how many people talk about all the people who work "under" them. It's a focus on authority, with an authoritarian focus. When one seeks to serve, the authority he wields will occur differently for people... it is to serve the team and company, not his own self-aggrandizement. <br /><br />This is also true of an overall creative understanding of responsibility... that one is the source of possibility by choosing to be responsible rather than being a victim. A victim views authority as a scarce commodity, which is to be protected and defended. The responsible manager seeks to serve, which is an abundant resource that is created by his way of being. <br /><br />This may sound esoteric, but it's really about the source and purpose of one's power. Is it for self, others, or both? Scientific management, as practiced by most top U.S. business schools, views people as objects. Leadership appeals to higher realms of the human person, perhaps even the soul. Viewing people as statistics will not provide access to the extraordinary results top leaders produce in a variety of environments or situations. <br /><br />Coaching and executive development, practiced by true professionals, can support this, but the same distinction of authority vs. service applies. Ignatius Acton Chesterton OCDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18222603717128565302noreply@blogger.com