tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post1881956766534687147..comments2024-03-29T04:06:37.402-07:00Comments on Had Enough Therapy?: The Bitchy Boss SyndromeStuart Schneidermanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12784043736879991769noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-48592789523705583692017-08-04T23:27:28.900-07:002017-08-04T23:27:28.900-07:00Ignoring the gender aspect, it reminds me of the s...Ignoring the gender aspect, it reminds me of the studies that show we are often less compassionate to others who are facing challenges we've faced in the past, perhaps in line with "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger [and bitchier]." <br /><br />So this belief can help you rationalize that being hard on others (even like being brutally honest) is what will make them stronger, like boot camp. Of course boot camp has a psychological purpose, to break down our individual ego, and then rebuilds it up again with a team perspective. As well when you're in the middle of being broken down, you're not going to be sympathetic to your drill sergeant.<br /><br />http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-3286660/Walking-s-shoes-makes-empathetic-Scientists-lack-compassion-similar-problems.html<br />---<br />'We found that people who endured challenges in the past - like divorce or being skipped over for a promotion - were less likely to show compassion for someone facing the same struggle, compared with people with no experience in that particular situation.<br /><br />'Taken together, these results suggest that people who have endured a difficult experience are particularly likely to penalise those who struggle to cope with a similar ordeal.'<br /><br />Researchers say a big reason for this is something they term an 'empathy gap'.<br /><br />Though we may remember that a past experience was painful or stressful, we tend to underestimate just how painful that experience felt in the moment.<br />---Ares Olympushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09726811306826601686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-73301654753130296182017-08-04T18:03:42.190-07:002017-08-04T18:03:42.190-07:00misogynist: A man who dislikes women as much as wo...misogynist: A man who dislikes women as much as women dislike womenAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-12111997519213784072017-08-04T04:22:47.146-07:002017-08-04T04:22:47.146-07:00If you're gonna have tough love, it requires t...If you're gonna have tough love, it requires the love. A lot of these women described in the article ain't got it. <br /><br />The other one I despise is "brutal honesty." Honesty is enough. If you care about the other person, honesty is more than enough. No need to be brutal. Ignatius Acton Chesterton OCDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18222603717128565302noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-17452758490646233982017-08-03T20:57:53.253-07:002017-08-03T20:57:53.253-07:00JPL17, no disagreement - all leadership is hard, n...JPL17, no disagreement - all leadership is hard, not just managers. And yet perhaps the only thing that is harder than how to be than a good leader is how to be a good critic of leadership. <br /><br />And none of us are objective observers when self-interest or ego is involved, and all of us have our own individual "authority issues" that can have more to do with our own blindspots and unidentified defects than the crappy leader we don't like in a given moment for telling us something we don't want to hear.<br />Ares Olympushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09726811306826601686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-43524647814864582062017-08-03T20:06:33.680-07:002017-08-03T20:06:33.680-07:00Ares -- There's a huge difference between mana...Ares -- There's a huge difference between managing with "tough love", and simply "being a jerky manager". A good manager supervising people facing the same challenges he or she faced in the past will manage those people at the very least with tough love, i.e., trying to toughen them up enough to overcome the challenges. Whereas the jerky manager will basically belittle them so as to build up himself or herself.<br /><br />Bottom line, I think the studies you cited -- i.e., those concluding that "we are often less compassionate to others who are facing challenges we've faced in the past" -- are <i>not</i> guides to good management techniques. Instead, they simply prove the obvious -- namely, that most people are crappy managers.JPL17https://www.blogger.com/profile/10649330420822802850noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-77073418187468428562017-08-03T15:05:15.778-07:002017-08-03T15:05:15.778-07:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Ares Olympushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09726811306826601686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-14258018260962011492017-08-03T14:18:24.139-07:002017-08-03T14:18:24.139-07:00"There’s hostility among the women who have m..."There’s hostility among the women who have made it,” she said. “It’s like, ‘I gave this up. You’re going to have to give it up too.’ ”<br /><br />Shocker.<br /><br />With great suffering comes great entitlement.Ignatius Acton Chesterton OCDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18222603717128565302noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-9417688149656751112017-08-03T13:33:45.870-07:002017-08-03T13:33:45.870-07:00"Law firms have a reputation, at least from w..."Law firms have a reputation, at least from what I have heard, of not being the abode of stellar managers in general. Studies of management practices would have more credibility if they would focus on more 'normal' kinds of business organizations."<br /><br />I agree with this.<br /><br />Studying law firm management practices is effectively studying managerial pathology.<br /><br />If you are studying law firms, you already *know* that there is some kind of managerial disease. The inquiry should be directed to determining the precise nature of the specific dysfunction occurring in the law firm in question.JPhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11126071014909954387noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-1146045491923200862017-08-03T12:39:43.163-07:002017-08-03T12:39:43.163-07:00As noted above about Lockheed (and don't forge...As noted above about Lockheed (and don't forget PepsiCo), smart women with the right priorities can be effective business leaders. I happen to think Carly Fiorina did a good job at HP, and got burned by the tech meltdown. She was on my shortlist in the early 2008 presidential hustings. <br /><br />Law firms, and particularly large firms, are very different, and tend to have terrible managing partners of both sexes.trigger warninghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06310637474428322994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-89926745261667729982017-08-03T11:15:27.672-07:002017-08-03T11:15:27.672-07:00One thing I *have* noticed about the behavior of c...One thing I *have* noticed about the behavior of certain female managers/executives (NOT the ones I mentioned above) is a tendency to criticize women reporting to them in ways that I think a man would be less-likely to do. (By 'noticed' in these cases I do not mean observed personally but was reported to me by highly credible people who were there.) One example: a female executive criticized a woman's fashion sense to her manager, in the presence of other managers. The woman in question was not an outside salesperson or field engineer, but was a graphic artist who did not meet with customers or others outside the company. Another example: a high-level female executive was dismissive of a woman's potential for a promotion, because (she said) 'we don't want people that old in these jobs.' Again, said in a group of managers and in this case almost certainly illegal.David Fosterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15464681514800720063noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-16693775544842444722017-08-03T10:01:52.032-07:002017-08-03T10:01:52.032-07:00The CEO of Lockheed Martin is a women--extremely s...The CEO of Lockheed Martin is a women--extremely successful company, that.<br />The exception probes the rule.Susannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-28482320788698037162017-08-03T09:08:51.603-07:002017-08-03T09:08:51.603-07:00It strikes me that this behavior shows up in middl...It strikes me that this behavior shows up in middle-school as cliques form. There's always a "top meany". "Boss Hen"?Sam L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/00996809377798862214noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-42761570679737337352017-08-03T07:25:21.403-07:002017-08-03T07:25:21.403-07:00Law firms have a reputation, at least from what I ...Law firms have a reputation, at least from what I have heard, of not being the abode of stellar managers in general. Studies of management practices would have more credibility if they would focus on more 'normal' kinds of business organizations.<br /><br />Personally, I have had several female managers reporting to me who did excellent jobs, in my opinion and that of their (male and female) subordinates.David Fosterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15464681514800720063noreply@blogger.com