tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post2344655867033985420..comments2024-03-26T06:17:49.527-07:00Comments on Had Enough Therapy?: Your Integrity; Your IdentityStuart Schneidermanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12784043736879991769noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-47718121692822151432010-08-26T00:26:26.277-07:002010-08-26T00:26:26.277-07:00In re-reading your post, 'cuz it is worth re-r...In re-reading your post, 'cuz it is worth re-reading:<br /><br /><i>If you want to build your character, you should get in the habit of keeping your word ... in matters great and small.</i><br /><br />Well, that will probably expose you to the failures, traumas and events <i>in extremis</i> that will make you Know Yourself. Hence the "build character" part. Hahaha!<br /><br />I dunno.... Give your word sparingly and have the courtesy of not asking more of others than yourself.<br /><br />We always hear:<br /><br />"If you say you are going to do it, you better do it."<br /><br />That's weak and causes trouble. I would prefer if people taught:<br /><br />"Don't say you are going to do it if you might not, or don't really want to."<br /><br />At least then we can discern the feckless. Fecklessness is the default now. We gotta deal with it.<br /><br />--GrayAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-68478611008675051042010-08-25T23:48:28.211-07:002010-08-25T23:48:28.211-07:00I agree with Novaseeker: it is a good post.
As f...I agree with Novaseeker: it is a good post.<br /><br />As far as "being the same character throughout", I'm reminded of the studies that show athletes or performers who place the blame on external causes become more successful. If you internalize every failure, it seems you will become a failure.<br /><br />If you neurotically place every failure on your own shortcomings, you cannot analyze the root cause of each failure and you cannot improve.<br /><br />Put simply:<br /><br />1) You will occasionally fail to meet your own standard.<br /><br />2) It's not <i>always</i> your fault.<br /><br />Note: this is powerful medicine; apply sparingly to avoid being just another high-self-esteem failure. See a doctor if rash develops.<br /><br /><i>and if you are the slapper, the chances are good that the bad karma you have created will come back to bite you.</i><br /><br />My wife, trained in Buddhist karma and all in Bali, always corrects me on that. I can hear her saying:<br /><br />"There is no 'bad karma' if you are a Face-Slapper by nature. In fact, if your nature is to slap a face in that instance and you do not, you have earned a karmic debt. There is no good or bad karma, there is simply a debt in the next life if you don't act in accordance with your nature."<br /><br />Which really goes to the heart of your point of "knowing yourself"; Your Nature and What You Do.<br /><br />Unfortunately, it is usually failures, trauma and events <i>in extremis</i> that gives one insight into one's identity.<br /><br />I don't wish such experiences on people, so I'm not disappointed when others don't "live up to their word"; they may just not have had the dismal opportunity to know themselves.<br /><br />However, for the people I know who Know Themselves? They never disappoint. They give their Word sparingly, as do I.<br /><br />For everyone else, if they disappoint me, it's probably my fault for investing too much trust in them....<br /><br />--GrayAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8078379512095504946.post-45652639393479767292010-08-25T18:36:01.769-07:002010-08-25T18:36:01.769-07:00Excellent piece.Excellent piece.knightblasterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03042581488365314771noreply@blogger.com