We all know that optimism is good for us. We know that we
should see the glass half full. We know that a positive attitude is essential
to living well and long.
But, Jane Brody asks, do we really understand what optimism
is? Is it about attitude and sensibility or is something else involved?
Cognitive psychologists discovered the importance of
positive emotion when they noticed that depressed patients were burdened by
negative emotions. They also recognized that too many therapists had been trained in negative emotion, an thus, were ill prepared to help pessimistic individuals.
Clearly, the antidote for excessively negative thinking is
positive thinking.
Within rational limits, of course.
It’s better to see life as a comedy than as a tragedy, but shutting
out reality in the name of an illusion is not the most constructive way to face
the world.
It’s not a good idea to travel through life repeating
Candide’s mindless mantra: Everything is for the best in the best of all
possible worlds.
The real problem with blind optimism is that if everything
is for the best, then it doesn’t matter what I do. It’s still going to turn out
for the best.
If depression occurs when people become so pessimistic that
they give up, Candide’s blind optimism is its cousin. If everything
always works out for the best it doesn’t matter what I do. So, why try to get
things right? Why do anything?
Since it is too easy to misunderstand optimism,
Jane Brody’s recommends that we look at the definition offered by psychology
professor Suzanne Segerstrom in her book Breaking
Murphy’s Law.
According to Segerstrom, it is less about attitude and sensibility than about how we behave.
In Brody’s words:
… Segerstrom
… explained that optimism is not about being positive so much as it is about
being motivated and persistent.
Brody continued:
Dr.
Segerstrom and other researchers have found that rather than giving up and
walking away from difficult situations, optimists attack problems head-on. They
plan a course of action, getting advice from others and staying focused on
solutions.
Planning an action, taking advice, and focusing on solutions…
it’s what coaching is all about. It is not what therapists are trying
to do when they recommend that you explore your issues and get in touch with
your feelings.
Segerstrom is also aiming at a definition of optimism that
involves ethical behavior. It’s not about having the right sensibility; it’s
about doing the right thing.
Cognitive exercises help to produce optimism, but
the proof, Segerstrom is saying, is in the doing.
In Brody’s words:
Noting
that it is easier to change behavior than emotions, she eschews the popular
saying “Don’t worry, be happy.” Instead, she endorses a form of cognitive
behavioral therapy: Act first and the right feelings will follow. As she puts
it in her book, “Fake it until you make it.”
She
wrote, “People can learn to be more optimistic by acting as if they were more
optimistic,” which means “being more engaged with and persistent in the pursuit
of goals.
Many therapists assume that they must change minds first and
that a changed mind will allow or instruct a body to behave differently.
Yet, you can change your bad habits without knowing why or how
you acquired them. Worrying about why you have them will make them more meaningful,
and thus, harder to change.
Asking how you build optimism in Segerstrom's sense is like asking how you build
character.
You do it by doing the right thing even if you do not know why it’s the
right thing.
If you know how an optimistic person confronts problems then
you should do as that person does regardless of how you feel. If you act as
though you have confidence you will eventually gain confidence.
It suffices to know how someone who possesses optimism and
confidence would deal with a problem.
Brody offers other constructive suggestions, taken from the Mayo Clinic. To build up
your optimism you should solve the problems you know you can solve before
tackling those that are more difficult.
It’s like taking the SATs. First, answer the questions that
are relatively easy. Skip over the difficult questions and come back to
them after you have finished the rest.
Also, if you want to build your
optimism, you should surround yourself with optimistic people, with people who
are persistent and confident.
If you do not know what to do when faced with a difficult
task, you do not need to look into the depths of your soul. And you do not need
to become more conscious about how your parents ruined your life.
You should imitate the strategies of those people who have
the right attitude. Initially, it will feel unnatural, but eventually you will
acquire true optimism.
2 comments:
linked here: http://bobagard.blogspot.com/2012/06/how-do-you-acquire-true-optimism.html
Thanks again for linking me, Bob.
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