Thursday, February 13, 2014

Postmodern Valentine's Cards

Today's lovers are special. Having overcome the stereotypes that prevailed throughout most of human history they have reached levels of coolness unimaginable to their forefathers and foremothers.

For those young people, in particular, the Huffington Post has collected 21 perfectly modern Valentine's Day cards. They are especially suitable for those who have overcome gender stereotypes and have buried all vestiges of sentimentality. 

These cards will allow young people to express their true feelings, openly and honestly... without compromising their normal narcissism. And, isn't that what it's all about?

Here is a small sampling:

vday card together

vday card 11

vday card 9


Sam L. said...

PuffHo strikes again!

Lastango said...

That's funny! It would be good sport to try one's hand at writing up a few of those. How about:

-- From Ironic Me to PoMo you.

-- See - there's no heart or traditional stuff. (So don't feel like you need to call me out for sending you this.)

-- Me giving you this card does NOT mean I think you couldn't buy it for yourself.

-- Yes, this is recycled paper.

-- You are still in my phone!

-- Hanging out with you is ok.

-- Hey, whatever!

Stuart Schneiderman said...

Those are great, thank you!

Recruiting Animal said...

Stu, these are witty cards. No need to attack everything your enemies do.

Lastango said...

The New Republic cautions all card-senders that Valentine's Day is an Environmental Travesty:

"If your other half bought you a Valentine's card, be sure to say thanks for the 18.5 grams of CO2 it created."

"One estimate claims that making and transporting the average paper holiday card produces about 18.5 grams of carbon dioxide, roughly 600 times the 0.03 grams that it says is generated by the average email. Another puts the carbon footprint of an average greeting card at 60 times the footprint of an email -- one-tenth of the first estimate."

"It's even crazier to buy said piece of card stock, drive it to the post office, and have the US mail truck it to an airport and then fly it to its destination."

I'm guessing the big target is Christmas Cards and wrapping paper. Soon little Megan will report her parents to school authorities if mom & dad continue to drown polar bears with their retrograde religious practices.

Have a very merry Non-Specific Holiday, y'all!