What Do Women Really Want?

A man who wants to know what women want has one surefire way to find out. Ask….

If Freud had trusted women, if he had respected their judgment and been willing to take them at their word he would not have had to torment himself about the mystery of women’s desire.

In a recent survey young mothers were asked what they really, really want. The answer: they want to stay at home with their children. They would rather not work outside of their homes. 

Meghan Casserly reports:

At a moment in history when the American conversation seems to be obsessed with bringing attention to women in the workplace (check out “The End of Men,” or Google “gender paygap” for a primer), it seems a remarkable chasm between what we’d like to see (more women in the corporate ranks) and what we’d like for ourselves (getting out of Dodge). But it’s true: according to our survey, 84% of working women told ForbesWoman and TheBump that staying home to raise children is a financial luxury they aspire to.

What’s more, more than one in three resent their partner for not earning enough to make that dream a reality.

If this is true, then what are we to make of the feminist siren song that tells women that they cannot be happy and fulfilled unless they have a great career?

Are feminists lying to women about themselves?

Are feminists systematically disrespecting women’s desires and doing everything in their power to ensure that those desires are frustrated?

Feminism pretends to defend the best interests of women. In some cases it has enjoyed notable success in defending women’s political rights.

And yet, feminism has another uglier side, one that is not about politics but about the way a woman chooses to live her life. A radical ideology seeking a major cultural transformation, feminism wants women to conform to its idea of what they should want.

The national conversation about women in the workplace is a ruse. It shows how feminism manipulates women’s minds to make them believe that if they are not sacrificing their wishes for feminism’s, they are betraying that cause.

Feminism does not respect women; it does not respect women’s wishes; it does not respect women’s choices.

Working mothers who cannot afford to stay at home with their children resent their men for not being better providers. All the talk about the end of men has masked women's resentment of the men who are not affording them the opportunity to stay at home with their children.

Yet, feminism has long been fighting a culture war against the role of the male breadwinner. It has argued that a woman who depends on a man for financial support is a chattel slave.

There were times in history when women have been grossly mistreated. It is happening as we speak. There have been times when women have not been allowed to vote or to own property in their names.

Comparing those appalling practices to the custom of having a woman stay at home to be with her children evinces paranoid thinking. It's almost as stupid as thinking that a suburban housewife is living in conditions that are akin to those that existed in concentration camps.

If a woman chooses freely to stay at home radical feminists will say that she has been so corrupted by the patriarchy that she is colluding with her oppressors.

Rest assured, for radical feminists there is no such thing as a fact or an expression of a woman’s desire that could possibly disprove their ideology.

In reality, women do not stay on the job because they want to fulfill a feminist’s dream. They do it because they have to, because their families cannot maintain their lifestyle on a single income.

And they resent their husbands for not being good enough providers. Surely, this is not a good thing.

All of this means that a young woman who is not yet married and not yet a mother should plan ahead. For those young women who wish to make such  a plan Penelope Trunk offers some excellent advice.