Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Election Day Prophecies

You know what the polls say. You certainly know what Nate Silver thinks—around a 70% chance of a Hillary victory.

But, do you know what the astrologers, the fortune tellers, the soothsayers are predicting? Since polls are akin to prophecies, why not look at the predictions of some real prophets, i.e. astrologers.

Once upon a time a local New York television station offered every member of an adult education class a computer-created astrological chart. IBM had written the program. If the students would provide the relevant information the computer would give them their profile.

The students were thrilled to participate. One week after they gave up their information their teacher came in with personalized reports for each of them. They were all given time to evaluate the conclusions contained therein. Then the teacher asked them how accurate the profile was. Amazingly, over three-quarters of the students raised their hands. They believed that the charts described them perfectly.

At that point the teacher told them that they had all been reading the same profile. True enough, the profile had been generated by a computer program. Yet, the information fed into the computer was derived from Charles Starkweather. If you don’t know who that is, you will enjoy finding out.

With that caveat, and noting that astrologers tend to present information that always make them seem right, I move to an article that was just presented on Quartz.

Master Pun-Yin is a Chinese feng shui master in New York. Donald Trump consulted with him when building the Trump International Hotel and Tower. You cannot get better credentials.

According to Master Pun-Yin Hillary Clinton was born in the year of the pig. And Donald Trump was born in the year of the dog. So we are watching an election between a pig and a dog. Economists call these: “animal spirits.”

Does that cause you to respect Chinese astrology, or not?

Allow Quartz to explain the higher truths contained in these animal spirits, beginning with Hillary. I hope you are not thinking that we should now call her Miss Piggy:

People born in the year of the pig are currently in a “low cycle”, an unlucky time of constant obstacles, says Pun-Yin. You can’t get more unlucky than being publicly tied to an Anthony Weiner sexting scandal in the 11th hour of a presidential campaign. However, Clinton does possess all five character elements, making for a well-balanced temperament. She has three “water” elements, which suggest empathy and diplomatic skill behind what Pun-Yin describes as “the front of the iron woman.”

As for Trump, who many people do consider to be something of a junkyard dog, Master Pun Yin explains:

According to the Chinese zodiac, he is currently in his “high cycle,” says Pun-Yin. Half of Trump’s elemental composition is “earth,” and its heaviness suggests Trump holds personal grudges. He lacks water (empathy). He also lacks metal (an element traditionally represented by gold), for which he might compensate by seeking material things and, say, insisting everything be gold-colored.

Gold-colored… does that refer to the walls in Trump’s apartment or to his hair? Or does it mean that he was taking advice from a Chinese fortune teller?

What does Master Pun Yin see in Trump’s future:

Trump will enter two years of bad luck starting Feb 5, 2017, the year of the rooster, cautions Pun-Yin. He will be confronted with even worse trouble in 2018, when his own zodiac clashes with another year of the dog. Highlighting Trump’s aggressive demeanor, Pun-Yin says: “The voters already see how Trump is when things are going his way. Can you imagine in the next two cycles, when he’ll be in crashing cycles?”

This might mean that Trump will be president and that bad things will happen. Or it might mean that Trump will not be president and that he will have a monumental come-down.

Your guess is as good as mine.

Moving on to astrologer Susan Miller, soothsayer to the stars. One does not know whether that once included Nancy Reagan. Knowing that Hillary is a Scorpio and Trump a Gemini—whatever that means—Miller made some bold predictions.

First, Hillary's November 8 horoscope:

Expect to be in the spotlight with a lot of attention aimed at you as your daily work schedule undergoes a radical and surprising shift. This may be a time when you are truly able to step into your own and be proud of your accomplishments. While you are the center of the attention, you may also be the recipient of some good financial news that comes as a result of your new stature. You may finally have arrived at a place you have long sought.

This could suggest victory for Hillary.

Miller also points points out that Trump the Gemini is a conceptual person. In itself that comment can shake your faith in horoscopes. Yet, Miller adds that Trump was born with Uranus conjunct to the Sun. According to the stars Uranus is the planet of chaos, disruption and surprise. That might restore your faith in astrology.

Trump’s horoscope for November 8 reads as follows:

Expect surprises today from your business associates. Whether that involves a shift away from previous alliances or a radical new direction, you may be taken aback by the method and mannerisms of those with whom you work closely. Team projects may also carry a certain level of bubbling expectation or even rebellion as you try to navigate the waters of your relationships within those associations. Ultimately the day will be about kindness and subtle gestures that reinforce your bond.

To be fair, it does not sound like a prediction of a great victory.

Doubtless you would much prefer to know the views of the prophet’s prophet, the man who, to his believers, was the greatest prophet ever, Michel de Nostradamus.

Happily for you, the History channel had a program last night about what Nostradamus, living in the sixteenth century, saw in our current election.

The show says that Nostradamus was referring to Trump when he wrote about the “the great shameless, audacious bawler.” I would have more faith in his prophetic powers if he had spoken of a brawler.

As for Hillary, she appears as: “a masculine woman” who “will exert herself to the north”. It’s hard to argue against that.

How does Nostradamus see the election? The show offers these quatrains. The first seems to refer to Trump:

Overburdened he will not pass the gate:
He will speak with such great fury and rage,
That to fire and blood he will consign the entire sex.

But then, a text suggests that Hillary will prevail:

The blonde one will come to compromise the fork-nosed one
Through the duel and will chase him out:

Of course, it’s all subject to interpretation. And it’s subject to qualification when compared with other quatrains. Here is one suggesting that Trump will win:

When the great queen sees herself conquered,
she will show an excess of masculine courage.

One thing is certain. No matter what happens, the prophets will all be right.


Ignatius Acton Chesterton OCD said...

Penetrating analysis. Your best post on the election, Stuart!

In all seriousness, no one knows what's going to happen, because no one knows what's going on. So much hot air and spin.

Tonight, we find out if the pig or dog wins. Swine is tasty, and I'm a dog lover.

Trigger Warning said...

I could go for a pig roast.

On a culinary note, Ive always admired the pig roast recipe found in the Official Cheyenne Frontier Days Cookbook. It's the only recipe I've ever seen that calls for a backhoe.

Anonymous said...

This is Brexit all over again. It's Donald Trump vs the world.

Anonymous said...

First they ignore you,
Then they laugh at you,
Then they fight you,
Then you win.

Sam L. said...

"Bad things will happen." Yep; gaw-ron-teed! They always do.