Sunday, October 27, 2019

California Returns to the State of Nature

Satirical website The Babylon Bee celebrates California blackouts by explaining that the state has done it on purpose. The Bee has understood that the state is banning electricity in order to save the climate. It's not too big a sacrifice, is it?

California is being heralded as a progressive utopia after eliminating electricity entirely.


Working by candelight at his desk, Governor Gavin Newsom signed a new law that bans electricity, propelling the state into a progressive futuristic paradise. Newsom said he got the idea while experiencing the latest round of rolling blackouts in the state. He decided to make the blackouts the law of the land.

"Other, backward states still use carbon-heavy electricity, gas for heating and cooking, and wasteful air conditioning," he said proudly as people applauded around him. "But not on my watch. California has progressed beyond these archaic concepts."

The law also bans vehicles, forcing pedestrians to use innovative new horse-driven carriages. 

California has also led the nation in eliminating toilets:

Next on the legislative docket? The elimination of water-wasting toilets, to be replaced by just going on the sidewalk. A pilot program in San Francisco has been very successful, according to the homeless population there.

At the moment California is burning. One does not know whether this has occurred because electric companies have not updated their infrastructure or because the state has been such a good manager of the natural environment. Either way, fire is part of the natural world. And it really likes dry tinder. 

3 comments:

trigger warning said...

"If I wanted the power shut off for days by bloated, corrupt utilities enabled by bloated, corrupt one-party politicians, I would have stayed in India."
--- Harmeet Dhillon, San Francisco attorney

"By expanding the state's EV infrastructure, PG&E is continuing to help California meet its climate goals while making it more convenient for our customers to choose clean, affordable electricity to fuel their vehicles."
--- Geisha Williams, former PG&E CEO

:-D

Sam L. said...

I would bet some money (not much, though) that many of the problems that PG&E is experiencing is due to legislative rulings on what they are allowed to do, what they are REQUIRED to do, and and much more of what they are NOT allowed to do.

Sam L. said...

" At the moment California is burning. One does not know whether this has occurred because electric companies have not updated their infrastructure or because the state has been such a good manager of the natural environment. Either way, fire is part of the natural world. And it really likes dry tinder."

I suspect that the electric companies haven't updated their infrastructure because the Gov. and the Legislature won't let them, or has raised a mountain range of obstacles to doing that. Now, that bit about "the state has been such a good manager" sent me into a 20-minute laughing/coughing/damn-near-killing-me fit.