Tuesday, July 7, 2020

Transgenderism and Therapy

To express my unsurpassing charity I will note that Lori Gottlieb’s column yesterday demonstrates, first and foremost, that she does not sell as many books as JK Rowling. Whereas Rowling can get away with calling out the transgender lobby, Gottlieb seems to believe that she cannot.

So, in response to a woman who is properly distressed to discover that her son, upon returning from his year at college, now believes that he is a girl, Gottlieb offers up a mountain of senseless drivel about compassionate understanding and working on feelings.

She does not ask and does not suggest that the boy's mother question how this happened. She has not a word about referring the young man to a psychiatrist to evaluate his condition. She says nothing about suing the college and its guidance services for brainwashing her son.

Gottlieb shields herself from the mob by imagining that a boy who believes he is a girl really is a girl. If one were inclined to be philosophical here one would point out that the boy’s error, and that of those who accept this nonsense, is grammatical. These people have no understanding of the difference between being and believing. Just because you believe something does not make it a fact. It does not make it real. What you believe you are is not necessarily what you are. When your belief negates your biological reality the endgame is not going to be good.

Of course, Gottlieb argues for acceptance and trots out some pathetic pseudoscience to suggest that transgender children do better when they are accepted for what they believe they are. This is nonsense. It will be exposed as nonsense in the locker room. It will be exposed as nonsense when the child begins to mutilate his body. As noted previously, anyone who thinks that the problem is pronouns does not know how to think.

The mother who writes to Gottlieb is distressed at the simple fact that her son has been brainwashed:

Last summer when my son came home from college, he told my husband and me that he is trans. He said he is a girl, and I am having trouble with this.

My son and I were always very close. I struggled to get pregnant and when it happened, it felt like a miracle. He is my only child, and I was a stay-at-home mom while my husband traveled and worked a lot.

Now she has a new name, one I had no say in choosing. She confides in my husband more than me, which leaves me feeling like an outsider. Although I’m assured that I’ve gained a daughter, my input on clothing and hygiene is no longer solicited.

I expected some loss when I sent my child to school. I knew I couldn’t be his best friend forever, but I didn’t think I’d lose everything. It feels like a death. I don’t know how to process the grief. It sneaks up on me, and I have to hide in the bathroom to cry. It’s overtaking everything.

I’m not conservative. I love and accept her, but I’m worried for her. I ache when she doesn’t eat or drink during the six-hour drive back to school, because she’s avoiding public restrooms.

My husband works really hard to nurture me. He doesn’t pressure me to meet his emotional and sexual needs, but we don’t talk about what’s happened either. He doesn’t share my sadness.

The other night, my mom and I were looking at old photos of my child when he was young. His second birthday, his trains, his ripped-up blankie he wore like a superhero cape. It was too much. I told her to put it away, and I feel awful for that.

Please guide me.


As seems to be happening more often these days, the parents of transgender children are not raving conservatives. Thus, they feel a special need to adapt to their child’s beliefs, however delusional they are.

And you will notice, if you read Gottlieb’s response, that she has no real empathy or compassion for this seriously distressed mother.

Dare we mention that the mother had every reason to be distressed. And dare we mention that she might feel better if she did not feel obliged to pretend that a belief was real. She should think about how she might stop the boy from undergoing any irreversible treatments. She might consider it a stage. She might stop using the wrong pronouns for her son.

Anyway, if you want to see a clear picture of what is wrong with therapy today, read this article. 

As the poet said:

Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate.

If your Italian is not up to speed these days, the phrase means:

Abandon all hope, you who enter here.


urbane legend said...

Let’s start with the first one—the revelation that you have a daughter.
Ann, you should have stopped right there and thrown this column in the trash. You were there when this child arrived. You have always known you have a son, and you know you still do. What is extrenely hard to face here is you have a son who is mentally ill.

Transgender young people, like all young people, do better emotionally when they have the love and support of their parents, especially because out in the world, they face intolerant people and governments that want to take away their rights.

I can't find any evidence of this. Every right any person in the United States has is still had by this son. He can vote, own property, travel without restriction between states, and so on. What Ms. Gottlieb means, of course, is that he does not yet have the special privileges favored groups enjoy these days. Equality under the law is but dimly remembered.

Ann, love your son and let him know that. Then face your anguish, take a deep breath or several, and let him and your husband know that his decision is wrong, it violates human biology, and that whatever other problems he has will not be solved by this medical error.

I am assuming, as a layman, that the sex change question is or can be a response to other struggles, as trans persons still commit suicide at a high rate, don't they?

Giordano Bruno said...

Yes, the world is beginning to be bifurcated between those who live in some ring of the inferno, and between those of us who wish to decline residence. That is a correct distinction. As someone with some experience with fire, and mobs, and irrational, ideologically driven groupthink, I can say with some authority that this is not a happy endgame.

Anonymous said...

The woman says her husband doesn't appear affected by this disaster. I would bet that he is highly affected but chooses to be stoic. The parents can show a lot of disapproval and maintain that they do not have a daughter, only a son. The child will later (hopefully) thank them for having a boundary. If the kid is angry right now, let him be angry. He can even separate from them. If he has any brains he will recant this crap and return to the family. If they don't maintain that he's a son, he has nothing to return to.

Stuart Schneiderman said...

Well said... good guidance.

n.n said...

The transgender spectrum from homosexual to bisexual to intergender to neogender, too. Some deviation of physical and mental sex-correlated attributes is more stable than others.